Fears

Finally, an update from Africa. I have only been here four days and feel like not much has happened. This feeling is totally wrong though because things have been weird ever since I got on African soil.

To begin with, I packed all my suitcases fully realizing one or more would be overweight. I accepted this and didn't care because I was moving somewhere for a year. The amazing part was when I got to the airport and one of the bags came out to be 56.5 pounds, 6.5 pounds over the limit, the gate agent ended up not charging me anything. That started my trip on a very positive note.

Then, two things happened that gave me an idea of how Africa might be. First, on my flight to Addis the man sitting in the middle asked to switch seats with me since I was in the aisle. I've never had anyone just ask like that since it's pretty common knowledge that aisle or window are preferred. No one wants the middle seat so I told him no. Second, at Addis airport some man demanded my recliner chair because I was on the computer and not sleeping yet so I didn't need it. Of course I told him no, too. After the second incident I noticed this pattern of communication, people thinking they could just have something is they asked me. Good thing I have no problem with saying no.

Once I got to Juba, no one had been told I would be there so I had to hang out awhile. This airport was a really interesting thing to see. It is itty bitty, there is no real order to how things happen, no baggage claim like I've ever seen, and people clamoring to get everywhere all at once. It was pretty amusing. I used an airport staff's phone and got in contact with someone so I could get out of there but not before the airport staff started getting worried for my well being. I guess they noticed the lonely American just hanging out. They kept asking me if someone was coming which ended up working out for me because they had no problem calling someone for me. Sometimes it works out to look helpless.

Juba itself was funny, it is the newest capital city in the world but I would never use the word "city" to describe it. It's just a mass of stores that sell things and I could never quite tell what they are selling. I stayed at a hotel in Juba and while the room was clean, the shower was quite cold. One night, there was this homeless and probably mentally ill woman standing near the entrance of my hotel. (The entrance was a big metal sliding door over dirt, by the way. I just didn't want anyone imagining a holiday inn or something. This was nothing like that.) I thought nothing of her and walked by but as I was walking by, she jabbed me really hard in the shoulder kind of pushing me. It caught me totally off guard! The people sitting at the entryway thought it was hilarious and I just kind of shrugged it off.

This morning was the experience that prompted the blog title. Recently, as in about a year ago, I started to develop a fear of flying. I guess it was the last bit of fear attached to the earthquake. I'm not exactly sure where the fear came from but it has been quite present for roughly a year. It hasn't stopped me from flying but it does make things a bit more tense. WELL funny thing is, the only way to get to my new work site is to fly in a tiny ass plane for 2 1/2 hours. Awesome. I was feeling a little anxiety last night but though that whatever is meant to be will be. What can I do in an airplane if it is crashing? Nothing, so why be so scared? I prayed and felt quite peaceful. The next morning, I still had peace about everything so I loaded up and went on my way. It was kind of cool to go to the airport to get on a private plane! The plane ride itself was actually really cool, not scary. I could feel the plane being pushed around a little but the ride was smooth and I could see everything!

Once we got close to my site, I could see the refugee camp from the air. It was huge. I saw all the plastic covering people's houses and was surprised at how many houses I saw. When I say houses, please understand I mean huts, tents, structures like this, not houses like we would find in America. We landed on a murram airstrip and my first itty bitty plane ride was over. I am so so happy it wasn't 2 1/2 hours of anxiety! It was a very peaceful ride.

This is already a long post, so I won't go into much detail about the day. I was able to walk through the refugee camp and see what we had going on here as well as attend a coordination meeting to give me an idea of which ngo's were doing what. Both things were incredible experiences in different ways.

Walking through the refugee camp was different than I thought it would be. In my mind, refugee camps are a place of suffering, disease, and death. That isn't really what I saw, though. I had never really thought through what the purpose of a refugee camp was: to find safety. Even though people are away from their homes and there is suffering and disease and death may happen, they are just trying to get on with life the best they can while they wait for their homes to be safe. The camp just looked like a huge village with lots of mud. I could say so much more about this but I will leave my thoughts on the camp here. I'll explore it more some other time.

The meeting was the first time I have ever been able to actually hear what goes into arranging services for people who have nothing. Food, health, nutrition, access...so many things go into trying to help the people get through what they are going through. It was so interesting to hear about it all.

I will end there. Much more happened and I'm not sure I really hit on all the highlights but this should give you an idea of what life has been like lately. I'm having so many new experiences daily...it will be difficult to write about it all!